New Lines

F to a teacher who told him only grown ups open doors: click

V, raising his hand at the fire museum when his teacher said "none of you are going to smoke when you grow up": I am going to smoke cigars and cigarettes and vape!

V: Is abuelo R a criminal?
Me: No, who told you that?
V: He did!

Discussing future jobs with V he told me he wanted to be wrestler. I said that was a dumb job. He retorted: Why don't you be a mime?
Me:  A mime?
V: Yeah, so you cannot speak!

V to M: When do you run across the country?
M: Never.
V: Why is it cross country?

V: Is it possible to be invincible?

V: Are you being sarcasm?

V: A, you are too young to listen to Hamilton!
A: You were listening yesterday.
V: Yeah, I am older.

V: I'm having a hypothesis! (I think he meant epiphany?)

Recently....

V- Is there such thing as a race across the war?
Me- What?
V- Running across a war.
Me- No.
V- I did not think so.

V- Can you put Bill Jones on? (aka Billy Joel)

V combing his buzzed hair with a baby brush- I am shaving off the nets.
Me- Nits?
V- We actually call them gnats at school. Gnats.

A carrying a bucket, a stroller, and suitcase down the stair- I had a little struggling but I made it. I may have hurt my finger.

V on dogs- Girls are more aggressive.
Me- Dogs or humans?
V- Both.

F to V- Do you have an answer for everything?
V to F- Actually I do.
F- Do you want a kick in the butt?
V- Actually, I have an answer for that too!