Tanti Auguri

Feliz 6 enano! Long day filled with phone calls from many places, lots of gifts and a lovely evening celebration. Thank you for coming or calling or just remembering this little guy's birthday. TQMYTAMFCMC.

Hmmm

Nothing like getting soaked in a 30 minute walk under violent wind and rain while pushing a 150 lb stroller through swamps to BT. Glad I have extra shoes at work but I forgot to bring extra pants!

Also exciting on the random front, a call from a collection agency (!) alerting me that the twin medical services provided on 2/8/11 (yes they move fast!) were not covered by insurance. Guess they will have to crawl back into the womb.

A and V fight in Spanish and in English (A to V: I don't like it!, V: I don't like it either!) whereas M and J fight exclusively in English (M to J: You are the worst brother ever!)

Gearing up for better weather, the best auction ever, and maybe I should consider incorporating exercise into my life. My fat belly and aching body do not seem to equal my age. I was in better shape two years ago despite the two humans who lived in my belly.

Off to teach! Have a dry day.

Recent Lines

J waiting for his friend, who was late, after asking 1000 times when he was coming: I am getting old here. Where is he?
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Me to A/V this am: Vamos a tomar la leche.
V: No, let's go eat pasta.
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A to V during Sesame (as Grover introduced the letter of the day): Grover tiene V!
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L to A: Tu mamá dice que no podes tomar jugo (Your mom says you cannot drink juice).
A: Mamá dice time out L!
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J: Why do they always shoot special people like John Lemon and Martin Luther King?

Bouncing Back

from splatter vomit on the stairs. J was green when I picked him up from school and I canceled piano (ouch) a few minutes before J decorated the school stairs (at dismissal time mind you!) with hotdog vomit. J stayed home with the midgets and L while I had a (not) fun filled day at school. Tomorrow is Friday already and the weekend is already kicking my ass (tutoring and then dinner party tomorrow, swimming and dinner party on Saturday and J's 6th!! birthday party plus Oscar party on Sunday. Whoa. F is gone Mon/Tues and that brings us almost up to mid week next week. Why did I eat so much for dinner? Because I love Trader Joe's (or Brooks Brothers as J calls it). Hasta mañana.

Screwed!

Just got back. Tried to out AleVit down for nap since they only micro-napped in car. After one minute V was out of hte pack and play (shit!) and after I put him back and went to check in, A was straddling the bars, too far in to get out or jump out. If these kids can get out, and they can, I am F@*(^%&*#d! I may have to build a moat with robot crocodiles around the sleeping area.

Ta-Da!

Day 3 in the countryside and we have made some interesting discoveries. Never go look at a damn with 6 children and think that a sign that reads "recreational activities by permit only" is a joke. More on that later. Never underestimate the peace of mind that you used to have when neither twodler knew how to get out of their pack and play. I really hope V cannot replicate that skill at home. A, who never needs to sleep, thinks it is hilarious to get out of the crib and to try to rouse V to join her in the rebellion. Last night he yelled "silencio" to her which was pretty amusing. We can also confirm that V has major motion sickness and he projectile vomited at the two hour mark once again!

Mayhem

MoJo & AleVit have been in rare form. Yesterday M gave V a pen (bad idea) and he drew all over the wall (worse idea) and I cannot clean it. I guess it blends in the with rest of the destroyed wall.

At bath time V threw my (new) cellphone in the full bathtub while I undressed A. He thoroughly enjoyed how mad I got and did not mind his time out either. Crap, he is already over time outs. He laughed and responded "yeah, se tira teléfono en el agua" when I asked him it was something we do (se hace) or not (no se hace).

He must have been drunk or high on sugar (even though they did not have any) because by the time F came home he was crashing into A, laughing like crazy. When F said sternly "we are going to sleep" V  just mocked him and keep laughing.

In the afternoon (yes, all this in one day) while MoJO watched TV...
M: Clifford is over
J (with his penis out): No, it is not. He is not done watching TV.
He seemed un-phased and apologized when prompted. I told him to not do that in school lest he get in big trouble. He reminded me that a friend of his recently showed him his "front and back privates" and that nothing happened.

AleVit melted down at the pediatrician as soon as they remembered the pain associated with the place. When the doctor walked in, V yelled "I don't want it" to her. They were spared shots this time. Yay!

Today was another cuckoo day with piano, tutoring, home and back out to tutoring. Looking forward to the looong weekend.

F Week

J: I know an F word!
Me; No, we are not putting it on the list.
J: But it is an F word!
Me; But it is a bad word.
J: Can I just say it?
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Me to V: Te quiero mucho! Me querés?
V: No. Quiero a L.
Me: Querés a L?
V: No, quiero a A!

HIghlights

M to me: The job of a child is simple. Don't be rude and obey and your life will be perfect as a child. Right mamá?

J when he heard me comment on how some chickens are treated: Nobody touch that (chicken on the table). You need to follow the golden rule and treat chickens how you want to be treated!


V to me: I go "a-wah-go"
Me: Qué?
V: I go "a-wah-go" (repeat back and forth three times)
V: Downstairs! I go downstairs!'
Me: Abajo!

V & A on the phone with their great grandmother...
Me: Dónde está la abuela I?
V: Aquí. En el teléfono.

V with M's backpack on: Bye. See you tomorrow.

Feliz 2 AleVit!

I cannot believe it. So big. Happy birthday to you midgets!!

Look Who's Talking!

I started to think about V and A and language today and they are not just talking, as in repeating words or singing songs, they are expressing themselves! There is such a huge difference. They talk to each other (A usually cocks her head and says his name to convey the importance of what she is saying) and they know what they mean. L and I understand them the most (F needs a translator). I understand 90% of what V wants to say and maybe 70% of A's talk. The new element is that they are really truly speaking. As far as they are concerned, they are telling me and everyone anything they need to, the frustration of speech limitation has subsided. This is going to be make me trying to have them pass for under two years old to save money on admissions and such a bit tricky! Just today V out on a hat and said to L"Qué lindo"! Yesterday V scolded A  as she kicked the crib "Se rompe, A, not funny. Papi dice not funny, L dice not funny. Se rompe" as she laughed hysterically. A is all about "saca jama (piyaama) and "mete pema (crema)" and "pasta dientes- mi turno"- she is a big fan of personal hygiene products!

Two Days Until 2!!

What the heck? How could this happen so fast? Slow down monkeys!!

Funny Boys

J, with the perceptive eye: You guys must be rich. You bought all this stuff, including this house. You bought more stuff than abuela S. We have paintings, a refrigerator, so much stuff. I think we have more than one hundred stuff in this house, counting the house.

V to A after I said "say sorry": I NOT sorry. I NOT. I NOT sorry.

Some Lines

M- People used to think that girls were not powerful, but they are actually quite strong.

M when I told her patent leather red party shoes did not match the sweatpants she was wearing: If your opinion is not nice, just keep it to yourself.

J- I don't want a new president who could be mean and change the rules.


Random man to V on a stroll in the hood: Hey shorty!
V: No!
man: Yes!
back and forth like this many times until I dragged V away (both of them were laughing)

J to tía C: E is too cool for you!

J trying to walk on his heels for a Guinness World Record, M: You are not going to get one. Do you know how many stupid people, I mean you are not stupid, but how many stupid people try to get into that book?

M sniffing a bracelet she thinks One Direction wore (a classmate sold her the story): I can tell it is real because it smells like their armpit cream.

J when he saw the ribbon of an old medal in the garbage: You threw away a priceless medal?

J: I am quitting piano. It is too hard. And I am quitting school.
Me: What do you plan to do all day?
J: I need to play and be in peace.