July Lines

J: She's (abuela) back from Africa? She must have a tan! Wait, do old people get tans?

V while we had dinner: Mamá, do you still miss me from when I was in Miami?

V looking at J's wart by his arm pit: Why do you have another nipple?

A when J asked her what she had been dreaming: Some crap.

A to me: Why do boys always have penises?

Me to V: Is A your favorite person?
V: Not quite.

J looking at shitake mushrooms at the market: Shit take mushrooms?

J: Women are better fighters because they will like do anything to defend their kids.

J: Oh mamá, I might want to be a dj too.

J: Wait, they sell drugs at Duane Reade?
Me: That means medicine, not illegal drugs.
J: Where do people get drugs?
Me: Illegal places.
J, in shock: Famous people do illegal things?

J: I really hate when people smoke by famous places. If my friend is president, I will make him ban it.
Me: What if you are president?
J: I am aiming for goalie but if I fail I will try for president.